Hairdresser: We’re going to have to use a color remover to take out the blue pigment, then apply more pigment to allow for the proteins in the hair to adhere to it. Then possibly mix three different types of toners to reach the goal of your natural hair color.
Hairdresser: pretty simple
Me: this is chemistry
Hairdresser: yeah, but people don’t like when we talk that way
Hairdresser: so you’re a mortician?
Me: apprentice
Hairdresser: do you know why formaldehyde is used in clothing?
Me: I didn’t know that was a thing
Hairdresser: I think it’s due to the preserving qualities? But I don’t think that’s right.
Me: It’s not just a preservative, it’s also a disinfectant ‘cause it destroys bacteria as well as their food supply. It’s also a dehydrator.
Hairdresser: why not just use alcohol?
Me: good question. Formaldehyde is super cheap, so probably to cut costs
Hairdresser: is it really a carcinogen?
Me: yeah, I’m going to have so much cancer
Hairdresser: so you’re going natural to work at a funeral home?
Me: yeah
Hairdresser: while still in school?
Me: well we work in the funeral homes so we have uuuuh … experience with cases
Hairdresser: you can just say bodies it’s fine
Me: oh thank god
Five Minutes Later
Me: yeah so we don’t do autopsies it’s one of my pet peeves
Hairdresser: what if someone wakes up while you’re embalming them?
Me: there’s a huge difference between a living body and a dead one
second hairdresser: I think we should add more toner, but yeah I think rigor mortis would make it pretty obvious
Me: that and being in a fridge for a few days you will be dead by the time you get to us
Hairdresser: I think pumping them full of a carcinogen would help with that
Every time I see a video of a cat that’s just meowing constantly, I think about how they developed meowing exclusively as a way to communicate with humans.
Past kittenhood, I mean. Kittens meow for the same reason human babies cry; to tell their mom “I have needs and wants and I’m so so small and I hardly even know it!” But adult cats have other ways to communicate with each other. They only continue to meow because they realize it’s the only part of their language that gets have anything close to the correct response from humans.
Anyway. Whenever I see videos like this where a human and cat are doing that sort of call-and-response routine, like-
*human talks at the cat like its a person*
meow
*human talks at cat like its a person*
meow
-so on and so forth, like I dunno, it just hits different somehow. Like it’s not the same as dogs barking at humans, dogs barking is a “natural” dog instinct (to my knowledge), but adult meowing is a specifically domestic behavior. They developed it for us. They know we can’t really understand them, the same way the mom in this video knows the cat can’t understand her, but they meow at us anyway. And this cat’s plaintive meows are it begging to be set free of the grooming torture, obviously, but sometimes it seems like it’s just a call and response.
Like you’ll see a video of a human talking at a cat, and the cat meows back between sentences, and the cat is like lying with its eyes half closed or sitting with its back turned to the human and it’s meowing back anyway and you stop and think about it and realize that they’re doing the same thing.
The cat and the human talking at each other when they don’t need anything from each other, that’s- that’s just conversation. It’s literally cross-species small talk, because both the cat and the human are engaging in it just for the sake of hearing a response back.
They can’t understand each other at all, but they continue to communicate purely for the sake of communication. For the pleasure of each other’s company. For the sake of socializing with each other. We don’t even understand each other, and it’s still small talk.
And you think about that and you remember again that adult cats without humans don’t meow and it’s just their human company comfort language and you cry.
Oh fuck I’m so sorry I didn’t realize I reblogged this from you lmao
If you’re saying, “well, I need Chrome because I need such-and-such extension for my job”, the computer will not explode if you install another browser. Use Chrome ONLY for work tasks and use Firefox for everything else. If you’re concerned about losing your bookmarks, Firefox can import your Chrome bookmarks.
[ID: Firefox Library window. The “Import and Backup” panel is expanded, displaying the option, “Import Data from Another Browser”, which is also circled with a red MS Paint ellipse. ID end.]
For $5 a month, you can completely conceal your online activities from your ISP in a manner that isn’t just immediately monetised or turned over to the cops. No, it’s not free, it does cost money, but the money doesn’t go to line a billionaire’s pockets.
I wonder how much of this is because of work/school from home forcing people to use Chrome so all their stupid monitoring softwares and platforms can work.
This is also your reminder that you don’t have to use just one browser. You can use chrome for all the monitoring bullshit your office wants you to run and use firefox for everything else.
Be sure to add the multi account containers extension to your firefox, which allows you to be logged in to multiple accounts on the same website at the same time in the same window but in different tabs.
look on my five open tumblr accounts (not sideblogs, accounts!) ye mighty and despair.
Firefox is super good, folks. It’s good in a general “google shouldn’t own everything in the entire fucking world” sense AND in a “this is an actual good product that does lots of cool shit” sense.
ALSO make sure to add the Ublock origin extension on Firefox - I haven’t seen a youtube ad in five years and you don’t have to either.
While you’re at it, why not add the Wayback Machine extension so that if you go looking for a page that has been taken down the wayback machine will automatically offer you an archived version instead; also handy for documenting people’s shitty takes and winning arguments after they delete the original post!
Worried that Firefox is going to slow down your computer? In benchmarks, modern versions of chrome and firefox are pretty much the same speed but you can still install the auto tab discard extension ANYWAY so that it will snooze unused tabs in order to keep your computer running faster. Set it to sleep, discard, close, and store tags at your discretion!
And while you’re at it: install Firefox as your mobile browser for android and add those extensions to your mobile browser! Mobile adblock is here, baybee, save your data and enjoy a better mobile experience! And install it on iOS! iOS can’t add extensions, but at least it’s better than safari, and if you want a somewhat more private iOS browsing experience try firefox focus for iOS (which is also available on android but you can accomplish the same thing with extensions).
